As a whipper-snapper in her 30s, I have some insight into this. What do you think?
Most of these things are cheap to semi-cheap-if-you-think-about-the-use, and some are just experiences!
1. A single person xmas card idea
I’m sending out a Valentine to all my contacts! Mostly because I couldn’t send it out in December and because I love Valentine’s Day THE MOST and have wanted to sent plutonic valentines for YEARS! 2019 is the year!
2. An instantpot
Still holding out hope that my favorite instagram cooking teacher gets one too so I can make more than beans and rice. But yo — I have bought back* the instant pot in the money saved making beans and rice so quickly and cheaply (and deliciously!)
*My sister gifted me an instant pot! I would never have bought it for myself, and it’s made my life so much more full of soup.
3. A yoga practice
Wow. Triceps and waning body dysmorphia. And community! And just feeling better about my body and my mind. All because I got a monthly pass at a studio 2 blocks from my house in Greenpoint that does the dance-y vinyasa I love.
Yoga’s also given me an appreciation and knowledge about how my body is different … I have a huge chest, a very short chest-to-shoulder length, and really short calves (haha) and I no longer see it as a failure, but as just like, something that is happening that I can play with! What a revelation.
Also shoutout to being really uncomfortable in child’s pose! And double shout out to not seeing that as a failure!
4. To host a semi weekly/semi monthly gathering on a weekday or Sunday
Community is not something you come by easily, especially when people start prioritizing their relationships and careers and netflix queues. (or hobbies! Like skateboarding. Aka me. Soon.)
Having a consistent close friends gathering, whether it’s a Sunday Gravy situation or a movie night really gives you a feeling of being supported and loved, and of supporting and loving your people!
5. an update on your whooping cough vaccination
Y’all I caught whooping cough at age 32 and I do not recommend it. Unless you are generally healthy and you’d like a year of coughing in ways that make people want to step a few feet away from you, then go for it. The pertussis vaccination weans a bit in your 30s, so get it updated. There is currently an outbreak happening in 2019 in New York City (my friends send me the news updates) because people are not vaccinating themselves and their children.
I find this a bummer because I consider herd immunity to be the pinnacle of self care.
6. Meditation practice
I’ve been doing Vedic Meditation (that’s 22 minutes 2x a day!) for the last 2 years. I’ve slacked a bit in the last year and I’m feeling it.
Meditation is truuuuuly a workout for your brain. I’m more able to deal with extremely stressful, acute situations with more poise and with less impact on my overall feelings than ever before.
When I fall off meditating, it’s like going from having 12 hours in a day to having 5 hours in a day. It’s amazing how meditation takes time but also expands it.
7. An appreciation of the 70s
Men dressed in ruffles and women wore denim, America demanded rights and made them into laws (hi roe v wade), people danced at discos when they were sad, cars were cool and hair was long.
Everyone was low key worried about the world but they chose to address those fears with disco, community and denim. And Mr. Rogers and Sesame Street were in their heyday! What a decade I wasn’t alive during.
8. A deep conditioning routine for your hair
If you have hair and you’re a little worried for it, get thee to a deep conditioning routine. It’s relatively easy with a simple spray bottle, heat hat and a microwave (no jumping in and out of the shower and being annoyed). You’ll start seeing the difference in weeks. And then we’ll all have 70s warriror princess hair! Life will be beautiful.
Also … wow do I ever cover this in detail my curly hair must haves post. The conditioning part works for all hair types!
9. Skin feel good > Skin look good
No one looks at wine and goes “wow I wish I could put some ceramide on this and turn it back into grapes!” Same goes for your skin. F the beauty establishment, and let your skin age like a fine wine. One that’s housed in a lovely cellar full of all the best smells and atmosphere imaginable.
When you’re doing your self care regimen, think of things that will make your skin feel amazing — serums and lotions and whatnot. I tend to go either very basic (noxema and nivea) or very edible (coconut oil, honey, avocado and sugar) except for a really amazing feeling and smelling serum I splurged on from Lavido.
Mindful eating > Emotional eating
A ritual to get
an understanding of your astrology beyond your rising sign
A favorite chicken recipe
an understanding of how to make lasagne
a musical instrument in your home
friends that prop you up when you’re having that mid-life career slump
a vibrating shampoo brush
a foam roller
very beautiful and sassy loungewear, and possibly, lingerie
plants!
eyelash growth serum
A coffee shop where the barista always knows your order
Books about financial literacy
Books about overcoming codependence
Morning pages!
know how to play poker kinda well (this one’s still on my list)
a saying that’s tailored specifically to the kind of freakouts only you bring upon yourself (mine is, “what if you didn’t care about anyone’s feelings??” It sounds weird until you know me)
A legit good bra from a french company
dance shoes!